Types of Psychological Vampires

1. The Helpless Person

This person plays the game of “Why Don’t You…?” — “Yes, But…”. Here’s how it works: the helpless person shares their problem, and advisors (the donors) do their best to help solve it. No matter how many suggestions are offered, or how smart the advice is, the helpless person always has an objection. When all options are exhausted, a new game begins: “Isn’t it just awful?” In the end, the problem remains unsolved, the donors feel emotionally and physically drained, and the vampire is satisfied, having gotten what they wanted, and moves on to find someone else to complain to.

2. The Bluebeard

This person plays the game “Gotcha, Scoundrel!” They create a set of rules and fiercely enforce them. They humiliate, scold, and deprive anyone who breaks even the smallest rule. However, they don’t hold themselves to the same standards: they behave as they please, come to work whenever they want, and so on. Arguing or trying to prove your point is useless; even if you win, they’ll hold a grudge and get revenge when the opportunity arises.

3. The Alcoholic

This type usually has several donors:

• The Persecutor – Most often the wife, who takes on a parental role and tries to reform him.
• The Rescuer – Usually a doctor who tries to cure him. The Persecutor brings the alcoholic to the Rescuer.
• The Fool – This could be a mother who pities and excuses him, or “kind people” who give him money, “understand” him, and listen to his drunken ramblings.
• The Supplier – The person from whom he gets alcohol, either for money or on credit (which he always tries to pay back).

4. The Caring Mother

All her interests and her entire life are devoted to her children. From infancy, she raises them with “shoulds” and “must nots,” disregarding the child’s own desires, needs, and inclinations. As a result, the child may start to get sick. The Caring Mother takes the child to doctors, seeks out medicines, psychics, and so on. But if she meets someone who can truly help the child, she may, perhaps unconsciously, do everything to sabotage the treatment. Her motto is: “I’ll do everything for your happiness, as long as you remain unhappy. I’ll do everything for your recovery, as long as you stay sick.”

5. The Industrious Sufferer

A golden person! Hardworking, smart, talented, always willing to help. Very diligent, so they may even climb a bit up the social ladder. But they never reach great heights because they don’t work in their area of talent. They can’t leave a disliked but reliable job to pursue their passions. As they age, they start to get sick, and their vampire nature emerges. Realizing they haven’t achieved much and aren’t interesting as a person, they use their illnesses to keep loved ones close. This is their way of keeping their spouse around—after all, how could she turn away when he’s suffering so much?

6. The Eternal Prince

One of the “promising” types. A teacher’s favorite, always searching, moving from one club or hobby to another, and good at everything. But no hobby ever becomes his life’s work, and by age 35, he still hasn’t achieved anything, though he continues to show “promise.” Outwardly successful, he’s actually dissatisfied with his situation and blames his loved ones, his wife, and everyone but himself for not achieving more.

7. Cinderella

She wins sympathy with her meekness and modesty. She rushes to help, even if no one asks. Her family is the center of her universe, to which she selflessly devotes herself. In doing so, she gives herself the right to drain her loved ones’ emotional energy with conversations like, “I dedicated my life to you, and what about you?”

8. The Princess and the Pea

She creates a lot of noise around herself (or at least thinks she does). She believes everyone owes her simply because she exists. She doesn’t know how to be grateful, though she may verbally acknowledge that you did something useful for her. She downplays others’ help and exaggerates her own contributions.

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