Speech Manipulation Techniques
Manipulation in conversation often relies on subtle speech techniques that influence a person’s subconscious and decision-making. Below are 12 common methods used by manipulators, with examples and explanations of how they work.
1. Truisms
Here, the manipulator states something true, but hides a deceptive strategy within their words. For example, instead of directly asking someone to buy a product, a seller might say, “It’s so cold! These sweaters are great and very cheap! Everyone’s buying them—you won’t find sweaters this cheap anywhere else!” while showing off the sweaters. According to academician V.M. Kandyba, such subtle suggestions bypass the conscious mind’s critical barrier because they align with reality, making the listener more likely to agree unconsciously and make a purchase.
2. The Illusion of Choice
This technique embeds a hidden suggestion within a seemingly ordinary question, forcing the listener to act as the manipulator wishes. For example, instead of asking if you want to buy something, the seller says, “You look great! This suits you, and so does this one. Which will you take, this or that?” The real choice—whether to buy or not—is replaced with a choice between two items, making you feel like you’re making a decision when you’re actually being manipulated.
3. Commands Hidden in Questions
Here, the manipulator disguises a command as a polite request. For example, instead of saying, “Go close the door!” they might say, “Could you please close the door?” The second approach is more effective and doesn’t make the person feel deceived.
4. The Moral Dilemma
This method tricks the mind by first offering a harmless suggestion, such as “just try” a product instead of buying it. Once you try it, the manipulator immediately asks, “Did you like it?” Since the product is objectively good, you’re likely to say yes, which is taken as agreement to buy. The seller then quickly moves to complete the sale, making it awkward for you to refuse.
5. The “The More… The More…” Technique
This technique links what’s happening to what the manipulator wants. For example, a hat seller might say, “The more I look at you, the more I’m convinced this hat suits you best.” This creates a logical connection in the buyer’s mind, increasing the likelihood of a purchase.
6. Coding (Post-Manipulation Amnesia)
After a successful manipulation, manipulators may “code” their victim to forget what happened. For example, a street hypnotist might say, “You don’t know me and have never seen me! These things—the ring and chain—are not yours! You’ve never seen them!” If the hypnosis was deep, this suggestion can last for years; if shallow, the effect fades in minutes.
7. The Stierlitz Method
People remember the beginning and end of conversations best. Manipulators place the key words or suggestions they want you to remember at the end of the conversation to ensure they stick in your memory.
8. The “Three Stories” Speech Trick
This programming technique involves telling three stories in a specific order: start story #1, interrupt it to begin story #2, then interrupt that to tell story #3 in full. After finishing story #3, the manipulator returns to finish story #2, then story #1. Stories #1 and #2 are consciously remembered, but story #3, which contains the manipulator’s instructions, is quickly forgotten by the conscious mind and stored in the subconscious, where it can influence behavior later.
9. Allegory and Metaphor
Manipulators often hide their intended message within a vivid, metaphorical story. The more colorful and engaging the story, the easier it is for the hidden message to bypass critical thinking and enter the subconscious, where it can later influence actions, sometimes triggered by a specific “code.”
10. The “As Soon As… Then…” Method
This method is described by V.M. Kandyba: a manipulator predicts an inevitable action and links it to their desired outcome. For example, a fortune-teller might say, “As soon as you see your life line, you’ll understand me!” This links the act of looking at your palm to increased trust in the manipulator, with the real message being, “You’ll agree with everything I say.”
11. Diffusion (Anchoring)
This effective method involves the manipulator highlighting certain words or phrases in a story using changes in intonation, volume, touch, or gestures—known as “anchors” in NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). These cues are scattered throughout the conversation, and later, the subconscious responds to them, making the manipulation more effective than direct commands. Mastery of expression, pauses, and emphasis is key.
Types of manipulative influence on the subconscious for programming behavior include:
- Kinesthetic methods (most effective): touching the hand or head, stroking, patting the shoulder, shaking hands, touching fingers, placing hands over the client’s hands, etc.
- Emotional methods: raising or lowering emotional intensity, exclamations, or gestures at key moments.
- Speech methods: changing volume, speed, intonation, adding sounds (tapping, snapping), changing the source of sound (right, left, above, below, front, back), or voice timbre (commanding, soft, persuasive, drawn-out).
- Visual methods: facial expressions, widening eyes, hand gestures, finger movements, changing body or head position, pantomime, rubbing the chin.
- Written methods: Inserting hidden information in text using font size, style, color, paragraph breaks, or new lines.
12. The “Old Reaction” Method
This method relies on triggering a previously established reflexive reaction. For example, if a child was once frightened by a dog, seeing any dog later—even in a safe situation—can automatically trigger fear. Such reactions can be pain, temperature, touch, taste, sound, or smell related. To use this method:
- Reinforce the reflexive reaction several times if possible.
- The stimulus should closely match the original one.
- Using a complex stimulus involving multiple senses is most effective.
To create dependency, a manipulator might:
- Trigger a positive reaction (like joy) during conversation.
- Anchor this reaction using a signal (an “anchor” in NLP).
- Later, activate the anchor to elicit the desired response, making the person more susceptible to suggestions.
It’s recommended to observe the person’s facial expressions, gestures, and tone to identify their reflexive reactions and select a reliable anchor (such as a head tilt, voice change, or touch).