NLP Presuppositions: Practice and Application

What Are Presuppositions?

Presuppositions are the axioms of reality created by speech. For example, for the sentence, “The Queen of the United Kingdom took the train today,” the Queen, the United Kingdom, and trains must exist. Otherwise, the sentence makes no sense. So, the existence of the Queen, the United Kingdom, and the train are the axioms of this reality—they are presupposed.

It’s very easy to figure out what the presupposition is: put a negation in front of the sentence, and whatever doesn’t change is the presupposition.

• “When you leave the room, you’ll remember me.”
• “Even if you don’t leave the room, you’ll remember me.”

“You’ll remember me” remains, as do the existence of the room, you, and me.

How Do Presuppositions Work?

Presuppositions create a reality where only the desired choices exist.

• “Do you realize that you can handle this situation?” – In this reality, the person is capable of handling the situation, whatever it may be.
• “Will you come by tomorrow morning or after lunch?” – In this reality, the person will come by no matter what; the only choice is when—morning or after lunch.

Presuppositions are effective because they distract the conscious mind, which is procedural and straightforward, using questions, choices, and step-by-step instructions.

• “How interested are you in reading this article?”
• “You can read the article first and then practice presuppositions, or practice as you read.”

Presuppositions really do work well. But you need to use them correctly. If your entire speech is made up of obvious presuppositions, it can seriously annoy your listeners. Also, improper nonverbal cues—like tension or nervousness—can negatively affect your audience. They may start to feel tense or anxious, and their conscious mind will kick in and…

Another Example

• “Would you like to pay by card or cash?”
• “I wasn’t planning to buy anything at all.”

So, stay calm, build rapport, and respect your conversation partner. If a presupposition goes too much against their intentions—like if they’re not planning to buy anything right now—don’t force such a rigid reality. You can make it softer:

• “I see you’ve been looking at sofas for a while, and this one seems to have caught your eye. Maybe you should take another look and make a final decision.”

Effective Use of Presuppositions

Proper use of presuppositions is the foundation of any effective NLP communication. Presuppositions define the communicative reality, and if you control them, reality will be as you intend. If you don’t, reality may not turn out as planned. Sometimes, limiting beliefs and odd constructions slip into your speech, which can create a rather awkward reality.

• “Only a loser like me could have done this!”
• “When you realize you don’t like me, just let me know.”

Why should someone else believe in a new—bright, beautiful, correct—reality if you don’t believe in it yourself? These are your own limitations coming out in your speech. So, effectiveness starts with yourself, understanding your goals, and being aware of the consequences. If someone tells you that you can just learn a couple of tricks and everything will work out:

• “Just say, ‘Your place or mine?’ and she’s yours.”

—they’re seriously misleading you.

Further Reading

If you want to find all forms of presuppositions, check out the book: NLP Practitioner. Complete Course by Mikhail Plekhaty and Yuri Chukchurin.

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