NLP Emotional Fitness: How to Teach Your Body to Feel Differently

This article is intended for NLP practitioners who want to expand their counseling experience with a new technique. It contains a method designed for consultants working with clients, but NLP practitioners—and especially NLP Masters—can also use it for independent inner work with their own emotions.

The Inner World as Emotional Space

The inner world of a person can be imagined as a vast space. Physically, we have a body where various processes occur. Here’s a metaphor: planet Earth consists of the crust and the atmosphere. The atmosphere has zones of different pressure—some areas have high pressure, others low. For example, at the equator, the pressure is almost always very low. In some places, pressure changes according to different rules. Similarly, emotions in the human body fluctuate: inside us, there is a kind of “atmospheric pressure.” Emotional “pressure” is so important that people can experience emotional “spikes” that determine success or failure in life.

Scientists have studied the causes of atmospheric pressure differences and how it changes in different parts of the world and at different times. Usually, there are clear patterns that are scientifically explainable and repeatable. Inside a person, there are also “emotional” patterns. How do they work? How can we manage them? Why do we feel bad—why does “emotional pressure” drop in certain situations, and why can it stay low for a long time? Many people can fall into depression for extended periods due to familiar life situations—just as there are places on Earth where it’s always a desert or unbearably hot, or where droughts are predictable.

For me, the answer is simple: a person has learned an ineffective strategy and needs to urgently retrain. The brain plays the same old “record” thousands of times. A deeply ingrained pattern can seem hard to break at first. That’s why pattern interruption training should be done methodically and persistently. You can make smooth transitions to other strategies and emotions. To do this, you need to create conditions where these emotions can be imagined and felt. An NLP consultant can easily create such conditions during a session.

Mapping Your Emotional Field

Another aspect: how can we review our “emotional” field? How can we see a “map” of our emotions and learn to manage emotional strength, taking control of our own power? The Social Panorama model, proposed by Lucas Derks, can help us visualize our emotional space. For example, you can visualize yourself inside your own space, experiencing different emotions. Most likely, the emotions you use most often will stand out with submodal and spatial differences. Below, I’ll describe an NLP technique that uses spatial anchors. Note: you can also use the Social Panorama model for this kind of technique. The secret is that the steps and movements in this technique can be done in “three-dimensional space”—the systemic space of your personality using visualization and submodality changes.

Just as we can see wind patterns on a map of Earth, we can visualize a “map of emotions.” It makes sense to evaluate these emotions, set new goals, and develop new “routes” for your emotional “journey.” Few people want to vacation in the Arctic in summer, even if they live nearby. We want to explore new corners of the planet. Likewise, it’s time to stop sitting in the “province” of your emotions—it’s time to see the world in all its diversity! Maybe you’ll even soar miles above (in a plane or into space) in the hope of understanding who controls Earth’s atmosphere… In the same way, we can “look” at our emotions from above, from a bird’s-eye view. The next goal is to love these flights, to learn to fly easily and to distant lands—where there are many resources. This is freedom: the freedom to choose your reaction. In this metaphor, it’s the freedom to choose your emotions.

Before the NLP Technique: Gathering Information

The following technique is designed for systematic work with emotions and operates at the logical level of strategies.

Emotional Fitness Technique

1. Creating an Emotional Control Space
   1. Set up a coordinate system for emotions using spatial anchors. The practitioner asks the client to define a “coordinate system” for emotions on the floor. In front: the axis of increasing emotional intensity; behind: the axis of decreasing intensity. To the right: emotions appropriate for the context; to the left: inappropriate emotions. The client stands in the center (this is the state of calm or level 0). The practitioner anchors the client’s calm state. You can use sheets of paper with arrows and scales from 10 to 100.
      Note: To manage a system, you need to measure it. This is like “sea level” on every map. Any changes are compared to it. Just as pressure changes on Earth, emotional intensity rises or falls in the body, which is reflected in emotions, including nonverbally.
   2. The practitioner asks the client to choose 5–10 emotions. These can include joy, calm, confidence, humor, admiration, as well as emotions from the other end of the spectrum—fear, irritation, hatred, sadness, envy. On each sheet, the client draws a symbol for the emotion, briefly notes its submodal characteristics, and can write a metaphor for the emotion.
   3. The practitioner clarifies which new emotions the client would like to learn to experience. The goal is to add new emotions to the coordinate system for future work. New emotions can be added at any time during the technique.
      Note: Each step can be adapted to the client’s goals. If a client says they lack vivid emotions and often feel unresourceful, ask them to invent and describe new emotions. You can create a sheet for each emotion to place in the system.
   4. The client independently determines the appropriateness of each emotion in a given context. Based on this, they arrange the sheets with each emotion in the coordinate system.
2. Setting a Goal for an Emotion and Choosing an Emotion
   The practitioner clarifies the client’s goal related to a specific emotion. For example, the client wants to learn to maintain a state of calm. The goal is specified using the five-point specification model.
   Note: Goals may vary. If the client wants to get rid of an emotion, they still want to feel something instead. This technique is aimed at training and maintaining emotions appropriate for the context. Inappropriate emotions can be written on sheets and placed on the floor as spatial anchors, with the goal of transitioning from them to more suitable emotions.
3. Training to Anchor an Emotion
   1. The client feels the emotion in their body while standing on the sheet, associating with it. When the client subjectively feels the emotion strongly enough, they signal the practitioner. The practitioner notes the time it takes to enter the emotion—from the previous emotion to 70–80% of the new one.
      Metaphor: Learning to quickly inflate a balloon—inflate it, tie it off so it doesn’t deflate, protect it from outside influences, and control its shape and pressure.
   2. Exiting the emotion by returning to point 0. The practitioner notes the time it takes to exit the emotion.
      Metaphor: Learning to quickly deflate a balloon, as if it was never there.
   3. Repeat steps 3.1 and 3.2, timing each attempt. The goal is to reduce the time it takes to enter and exit the emotion.
   4. Repeat steps 3.1–3.3 for different emotions. The goal is to learn to quickly enter and exit various emotions. The client chooses which emotions to practice.
4. Changing the Intensity of an Emotion
   The client chooses an emotion they want to learn to increase or decrease. The practitioner asks the client to state the intensity level as a percentage. The client then moves backward toward point “0,” decreasing the emotion’s intensity with each step. Then, moving forward, they increase the intensity. After reaching maximum intensity, the practitioner suggests the client move the “emotion” sheet forward and step onto it to further increase the emotion’s intensity. If desired, the client can “extend” any emotion, experiencing it at rare levels of intensity (e.g., 150–300%). The client can also “reduce to zero” any emotion by moving the sheet closer to point “0.”
   Metaphor: Pressing and releasing the gas pedal.
5. Training to Change the Intensity Level of Emotions
   1. The client moves from the “emotion” sheet to point 0, practicing voluntary changes in emotion intensity. Attention! The practitioner not only calibrates the client but also asks how clearly their state changes as they move. It’s important that the emotion changes in clear accordance with the direction and speed of movement along the line.
   2. The practitioner times the change in intensity—both “decreasing” and “increasing” the emotion. For each emotion, the client imagines a clear scale, for example, a 100-point scale. Now, the client can reduce the time it takes to change the intensity of an emotion, e.g., from 10 to 70 points, so they can quickly adjust the strength of the emotion.
      Metaphor: How quickly can we inflate a balloon from 10 cm to 50 cm, to 80 cm? We learn to do this quickly.
      Another metaphor: How quickly does a car accelerate or decelerate?
   3. Repeat step 5.2 with different emotions. The goal is to learn to quickly change the intensity of any emotion to the desired level.
      Note: Different clients may have their own challenges. For example, some may increase the intensity of positive emotions quickly, but find it hard to decrease negative emotions.
6. Training to Maintain an Emotion
   1. Choose an emotion, associate with it by standing on the sheet. The client states the intensity level. The practitioner times how long the client can maintain the emotion at that intensity. Different emotions at different intensities can be maintained for different lengths of time. Practice holding emotions at 50%, 70%, and 100% intensity. Focus more on emotions that are hard to maintain for long.
   2. Create more challenging conditions for maintaining the emotion. For example, imagine speaking in front of a large audience and needing to hold a certain emotion. The practitioner times how long the client can maintain the emotion in this situation. Repeat several times to extend the duration and learn to maintain the emotion in new situations.
7. Training the Speed of Transition from One Emotion to Another
   1. Time the transition from one emotion to another. Move from one sheet to another in the coordinate system.
   2. It’s important to note the intensity level you’re transitioning to. Practice transitioning from one emotion to another at different intensity levels. For example, move from joy at 50 points to confidence at 100 points. This may take different amounts of time.