15 Core Principles of NLP

Adapted from Barbara Seidl – NLP: Models of Effective Communication

Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) is built on a set of foundational principles that describe the theories behind successful communication. Here are the 15 core principles of NLP:

1. Every Person Is Unique and Perceives Reality in Their Own Way

People are different from one another. Each person is one of a kind and tends to see themselves as the center of their own world. Accepting the uniqueness of others means recognizing their value, respecting their individuality, and understanding that everyone perceives and reacts to the world in their own way. This leads to personal conclusions, priorities, and images that can be freely combined.

2. Mind, Body, and Environment Form a Unified System

A person’s mindset affects their mental and physical well-being, and their behavior influences their thoughts. If any part of this system changes, the entire system restructures itself.

3. All Behavior Is Communication

Everything we do sends messages to the outside world—whether through gestures, posture, or even silence. A person’s behavior is the only visible, audible, and tangible indication of their internal information processing. Abilities and traits can only be inferred from individual behavior; everything else is assumption or interpretation.

4. The Meaning of Communication Is Determined by the Response It Elicits

Who is responsible for successful communication—the sender or the receiver? If communication leads to an undesired reaction, the sender also shares responsibility for ensuring the message is understood correctly. What matters is what the recipient perceives, not just the sender’s intention. The sender must take responsibility for their message.

5. People Rely on Mental Maps

The map is not the territory, just as a menu is not the food and sheet music is not the music itself. Mental maps are models of reality that help us navigate the world. While everyone has mental maps, we use them differently based on our perception preferences, which can lead to misunderstandings. The first step to understanding and successful communication is getting to know each other’s mental maps. We can’t change reality, but we can change our mental maps—their scale, evaluation criteria, and uses. The value of a map lies in personal choice.

6. It’s Better to Have Choices Than None at All

Whether it’s about products or actions, having options is beneficial. NLP methods open up new horizons and offer alternatives. True choice exists only when there are at least three different options. One option is compulsion; two options create a dilemma. Only with three or more alternatives do we have real freedom of choice.

7. People Choose the Best Option Available to Them at the Time

Everyone follows their own path in life, learning what they can do and how best to act. We typically choose the options that benefit us most. If someone doesn’t see enough benefit or faces problems, they should seek new behaviors that better solve the issue.

8. All Behavior Has Meaning

In their own world and according to their mental map, people always act appropriately. An observer may not see the sense in someone else’s behavior, but for the person acting, it makes sense.

9. Every Behavior Is Driven by a Positive Intention

This principle is often met with skepticism. How can behavior that negatively affects others have a positive intention? NLP distinguishes between a person’s behavior and their intentions. According to their mental map, the behavior is correct and beneficial. Often, the supposed benefit behind unproductive behavior is called a secondary gain.

10. All Behavior Is Justified in a Certain Context

Behavior is appropriate and effective only when it fits the situation. Sometimes, behavior that works in one context is transferred to another where it’s no longer suitable and leads to negative outcomes. It’s important to identify the right behavior for each context.

Example: Aggression may be appropriate in life-threatening situations but is considered a crime in others.

11. People Have All the Resources They Need for Change

Everyone has a vast array of resources and abilities, many of which are underutilized. People can learn, grow, and increasingly tap into their potential.

12. Anything One Person Can Do, Another Can Learn

NLP assumes that anything one person has learned and mastered can also be learned by anyone else. Ideal behaviors can be observed and adopted. Motivation, decision-making, creativity, self-confidence, and other skills can be developed. The first steps in NLP are based on modeling and going through the same neurological processes and mental maps as the model. Success and excellence have a structure that can be learned.

13. There Is No Failure, Only Feedback

Getting stuck in the past is a mistake that distracts from your goal. If you see your goal as a new opportunity, your perspective changes. Mistakes push us toward new solutions, highlight areas for improvement, and reveal the path to our goals. Ask yourself:

• What have I achieved so far?
• What can I learn from this?
• What is already working well?
• What else needs to be done?
• What can I do differently?
• What other opportunities are available?
• What alternatives exist on the way to my goal?
• What opportunity does my current situation present?

14. If What You’re Doing Isn’t Working, Try Something Else

This principle applies when you have options. Many people, when faced with problems, don’t change their usual behavior and may even make things worse—for example, by yelling when there’s a misunderstanding. Such behavior is ineffective. Flexibility—the willingness to try something completely different—often leads to better results. Personal growth comes from creating new perspectives. This viewpoint is based on rejecting blame: others are not responsible for your situation. Don’t wait for your environment to change; take full responsibility and change your own behavior. Flexibility also applies to the NLP principles themselves: if a principle no longer helps in a given situation, it’s better to try something else. NLP principles are not absolute truths and should be tested through personal experience.

15. The Most Flexible Element in a System Controls It

Being flexible means having many options. People who demonstrate flexibility and suggest new ideas are less likely to get stuck. The more alternatives a person has, the easier it is to achieve the desired response in communication.

Example: In a meeting that’s at a standstill, one participant suggests a new way of thinking, a different method, or a change—like a short creative break, changing locations, or addressing the speaker. This person acts as the flexible element in the group and, through their suggestions, creates opportunities to resolve the situation, significantly influencing the system.

How Our Perception Works According to NLP

There are many theories about how people think. NLP suggests that we use our senses—when we think or remember, we see images, hear sounds, smell, taste, and feel sensations. This means all thought processes are connected to sensory experiences. Meaning is perceived through the senses, processed, and only then put into words.