NLP in Negotiations
In today’s world, driven by information and knowledge, traditional rules of negotiation are rarely used. New, systematic approaches to the art of reaching agreements are needed. No one can act as if they live in isolation—there are always people who play important roles in our lives and businesses. We cannot fully succeed until we learn to manage our relationships in ways that help us move toward our goals. Of course, other people have their own goals as well. Clearly, one of the keys to effective relationships is learning how to create win-win situations that benefit all parties involved.
How can you avoid falling for your partner’s tricks and conduct negotiations that are truly beneficial?
As Antoine de Saint-Exupéry said, “Communication is the greatest pleasure.” Yet about 70% of people fail in business simply because they don’t know how to present themselves properly at business meetings or take a leading position in conversations.
Negotiation is a process of two-way information exchange aimed at reaching an agreement when the parties’ interests only partially overlap.
Professional negotiation skills and knowledge of techniques can help you achieve your desired results. Negotiations are like a game, where all participants carefully calculate each other’s moves. Success comes to those who maneuver skillfully and are willing to compromise as part of a well-thought-out strategy.
From a psychological perspective, business negotiations are a form of competition or even struggle. If you show weakness or emotional instability, the other side will almost certainly take advantage of the situation to push their own agenda.
People who are successful negotiators always try to maintain a winner’s style of behavior. They are more persistent than aggressive and oppose hostility, even if others are unwilling to cooperate.
Gestures can help set the right tone for a conversation. It is entirely possible to learn how to manage your nerves and emotions, as well as to psychologically prepare for negotiations.
Key Behaviors for Successful Negotiations
- Be flexible. Start your negotiations with clear goals in mind. Be ready to change the rules of the game based on what you learn about your counterpart’s desires.
- Clearly state your objectives. Ask people to describe their desired outcomes for the negotiations. This is a crucial factor if you want to succeed. However, having an idea alone won’t ensure your or their intentions are fulfilled. A win in negotiations is when both you and your opponent, working together, find ways to achieve both your goals and those of your counterpart.
- Focus on reasons, not just positions. If you and your client have different opinions, find out the reasons behind these differences. If you think a certain way, there’s a reason you made that decision.
- Look for options. Focus on creatively generating alternative solutions, ideas, and opportunities that best meet the goals of both parties. Two heads are better than one.
- Don’t rush. Don’t respond to pressure or urgency by making hasty decisions. Take a pause to give yourself time to think about your next steps.
As a negotiator, you should know that other people’s perspectives on the importance of issues may differ from your own. Everyone sees things their own way. Understanding how much your counterpart values each position will help you respond effectively.
Surprisingly, negotiation skills are also the key to long-lasting, stable, and interesting personal relationships (proven in practice!). NLP has developed many models for effectively influencing your conversation partner; for successful negotiations, it is extremely important to know, understand, and apply NLP skills. That’s why NLP models and techniques are widely and productively used in negotiation training.
Respect your partners—learn the techniques of successful negotiations.