What Is Pathological Lying and How to Recognize It

Living a life without any lies is nearly impossible. Whether it’s a polite white lie or a calculated, cynical deception, we all do it. But not all lies are the same, and some can be much more harmful than others.

Types of Lies: Ordinary vs. Pathological

Even if some people don’t want to admit it, everyone lies at some point, and these lies come in different forms. While lying is generally frowned upon, some types of lies are relatively harmless, while others are more serious and misleading. According to research, lies can be divided into three categories: white lies, gray lies, and real lies. Lies can also be accidental or intentional.

Pathological lying goes beyond the occasional or intentional falsehoods that most of us tell from time to time. It’s a senseless and relentless fabrication that defies simple explanation.

Because liars are often skilled at twisting or altering the truth, pathological lying can be hard to detect and recognize. However, psychological research has made it easier to identify, assess, and understand this behavior.

How to Identify Different Types of Lies

White Lies

White lies are generally considered acceptable because they protect others from harm. These are harmless, often well-intentioned lies told to spare someone’s feelings, avoid unnecessary conflict, or prevent discomfort. They usually have minimal consequences and are generally socially acceptable.

For example, complimenting your aunt’s cooking even if you didn’t like the food, just to be polite and keep the peace.

While white lies may seem harmless, they can still damage well-being and relationships by undermining trust and preventing genuine honesty.

Gray Lies

Gray lies don’t fit neatly into the categories of white or real lies. They aren’t necessarily as malicious as real lies, but they’re more serious than white lies.

Gray lies might be used to avoid unnecessary conflict or discomfort, but they don’t always have the pure intentions of white lies. Examples include omitting important facts in a conversation, which can be just as deceptive as outright lying. For instance, not telling a friend that their partner was flirting with someone else, even though you witnessed it.

Another type of gray lie is exaggeration—stretching or embellishing the truth to make a story more interesting or to impress others. For example, bragging about how much you can bench press by inflating the actual number.

Real Lies

Real lies are more deceptive and intentional, meant to gain personal advantage, hide wrongdoing, or manipulate others. They don’t happen as often, but they are planned and carried out for specific reasons and can have negative social and legal consequences.

Pathological Lying and Its Features

Pathological lying is different from “ordinary” lying in both quantity and quality. It is frequent, chronic, and excessive.

Pathological lying often seems illogical. Most pathological liars report being unable to stop lying, even when they want to. This behavior is compulsive, meaning liars often can’t point to a clear motivation.

According to research, pathological lying is a disorder characterized by a compulsive habit of fabricating information, often without any obvious reason.

Pathological Lying (Pseudologia Fantastica)

Also known as pseudologia or mythomania, this is a mental state associated with a compulsive urge to lie without clear benefit or reason. It’s characterized by creating dramatic and vivid stories to impress others. Often, it’s driven by feelings of guilt or shame, to avoid any real or potential conflict. Typically, the person isn’t afraid of being caught.

Pathological lying is not a standalone diagnosis and can be a symptom of narcissistic or antisocial personality disorder, or psychopathy.

Pathological lying often serves as a psychological defense mechanism, used to deny reality or protect oneself from painful events. This kind of lying is often driven by a desire to avoid shame or internal conflict, compensate for feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and so on. By presenting wishful thinking as reality, the pathological liar tries to appear better, stronger, richer, or more successful than they really are.

It’s important to distinguish pathological lying from delusional or other psychotic disorders (where a person is fully convinced their stories are real). Usually, pathological liars are aware of their dishonesty—they just can’t control it. Lying becomes a constant part of their lives.

Traits of a Pathological Liar

Researchers have identified five traits common to pathological liars:

• They are excellent storytellers, with vivid, dramatic, fantastic, and detailed tales.
• Their lies can be convincing, as they tend to act like natural performers.
• They often portray themselves as either victims or heroes in their stories.
• By constantly retelling their lies, they desperately want to believe the lies are reality, and so they fully immerse themselves in the role.
• When faced with disbelief or doubt during a conversation, they tend to speak anxiously, avoid specifics, and dodge direct answers.

The behavior of a pathological liar usually involves inventing complex stories to impress others and adding more lies when questioned, encouraging listeners to accept them as reality.

If others raise questions or doubts, pathological liars typically make up additional stories to avoid exposure and conflict—again and again. That’s why pathological lying is characterized by one lie piling on top of another, growing like a snowball.

There is scientific evidence that the brain of a pathological liar is different from that of someone who doesn’t lie often. Studies have shown that pathological liars have less gray matter (neurons) and more white matter (nerve fibers) in the prefrontal cortex.

Can Pathological Lying Be Identified?

Recognizing pathological lying can be incredibly difficult. A study published in the journal Psychiatric aimed to develop a self-assessment scale to measure this behavior. You should consider each of the following seven statements and indicate how much you agree or disagree with them:

1. My lying behavior has led to problems in my career, social relationships, finances, and legal matters.
2. My lying causes me significant distress.
3. My lies have put myself and others in danger.
4. My lying is out of my control.
5. After I lie, I feel less anxious.
6. My lies tend to grow compared to previous lies.
7. Most of the lies I tell happen for no reason.

According to researchers, pathological liars face more serious problems in terms of emotional, social, legal, and financial well-being. They “report more stress, impaired functioning, and greater danger than people who are not considered pathological liars.”

Pathological lying, with its constant need to fabricate information, can significantly impact overall well-being. It undermines trust in relationships and makes it difficult to maintain genuine connections with others. This pattern of dishonesty can lead to chronic emotional stress and anxiety, as the liar becomes entangled in their own web of lies.

In severe cases, pathological lying can lead to legal problems and financial instability, further worsening the damage to emotional, social, and even physical health.

Recognizing and addressing pathological lying is crucial for maintaining well-being and developing healthier, more authentic relationships.